Find Self Esteem Counseling

Medically reviewed by Gabriela Asturias, MD on June 24, 2024
Written by the MiResource team

If you often doubt yourself, second-guess your worth, or feel like you're not good enough, you're not alone. With the right support, self esteem counseling can help you rebuild how you see yourself and create a stronger, more compassionate inner voice.

  • Dog Fausto, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT)

    Dog Fausto

    Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT)

    5201 Great America Pkwy, Santa Clara, California 95054

    Dog Fausto is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) in Santa Clara, California. They treat Self Esteem, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), Adoption.

    Mercy is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in California .

    View profile
  • Ama Deus, Certified Clinical Social Worker (CSW)

    Ama Deus

    Certified Clinical Social Worker (CSW), Community Resource

    Remote only

    Ama Deus is a Certified Clinical Social Worker (CSW) in Brisbane, California and has been in practice for 20 years. They treat Self Esteem, Racial/Cultural Oppression or Trauma, Medication Concerns.

    test test test

    View profile
  • Mercy Fausto, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT)

    Mercy Fausto

    Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT)

    5201 Great America Pkwy, Santa Clara, California 95054

    Mercy Fausto is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) in Santa Clara, California. They treat Self Esteem, Depression, Anorexia Nervosa.

    Mercy is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in California

    View profile
  • Aristotle Fernandez, Board Certified Behavior Analyst (BCBA)

    Aristotle Fernandez

    Board Certified Behavior Analyst (BCBA), Certified Addiction Counselor (CAC), Audiologist, Certified Clinical Social Worker (CSW), Academy of Certified Social Workers License (ACSW), Advanced Practice Registered Nurse (APRN), Associate Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Eating Disorder Specialist, Certified Group Psychotherapist (CGP), Certified Social Worker (CSW), Certified Trauma Professional, Community Resource, Counselor, Credentialed Sexual Abuse Youth Clinician (CSAYC), Diplomate in Clinical Social Work (DCSW), Education Specialist (EdS), Executive Function Coach, Hypnotherapist, Independent Substance Abuse Counselor, Licensed Addiction Counselor (LAC), Licensed Associate Counselor (LAC), Licensed Clinical Addictions Counselor (LCAC), Licensed Clinical Marriage and Family Therapist, Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor (LCMHC), Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor (LCPC), Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW), Licensed Clinical Social Worker Associate, Licensed Graduate Social Worker, Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker (LICSW), Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), Licensed Master Level Psychologist (LMLP), Licensed Master Social Worker (LMSW), Licensed Masters Addiction Counselor (LMAC), Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC), Licensed Mental Health Practitioner (LMHP), Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor (LPCC), Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC), Licensed Psychological Examiner-Independent, Licensed Sex Offender Treatment Provider (LSOTP), Licensed Social Worker (LSW), Licensed Specialist Clinical Social Work (LSCSW), Limited Licensed Master Social Worker (LLMSW), Limited Licensed Professional Counselor (LLPC), Marriage and Family Therapist (MFT), Marriage, Family, and Child Counselor (MFCC), Massage Therapist, National Certified Counselor (NCC), Neuropsychologist, Nurse Practitioner, Nurse Psychotherapist, Nutritionist, Occupational Therapist

    1951 Tavern Court, Alpine, California 91901

    Aristotle Fernandez is a Board Certified Behavior Analyst (BCBA) in Alpine, California. They treat Self Esteem, Eating Concerns, Physical Assault.

    tt

    View profile
  • Olena Preprod, Certified Addiction Counselor (CAC)

    Olena Preprod

    Certified Addiction Counselor (CAC), Certified Clinical Social Worker (CSW), Certified Eating Disorder Specialist, Board Certified Behavior Analyst (BCBA), Audiologist, Certified Group Psychotherapist (CGP), Academy of Certified Social Workers License (ACSW), Advanced Practice Registered Nurse (APRN), Associate Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Social Worker (CSW), Certified Trauma Professional, Community Resource, Counselor, Credentialed Sexual Abuse Youth Clinician (CSAYC), Diplomate in Clinical Social Work (DCSW), Education Specialist (EdS), Executive Function Coach, Hypnotherapist, Independent Substance Abuse Counselor, Licensed Addiction Counselor (LAC), Licensed Associate Counselor (LAC), Licensed Clinical Addictions Counselor (LCAC), Licensed Clinical Marriage and Family Therapist, Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor (LCMHC), Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor (LCPC), Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW), Licensed Clinical Social Worker Associate, Licensed Graduate Social Worker, Licensed Independent Clinical Social Worker (LICSW), Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT), Licensed Master Level Psychologist (LMLP), Licensed Master Social Worker (LMSW), Licensed Masters Addiction Counselor (LMAC), Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC), Licensed Mental Health Practitioner (LMHP), Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor (LPCC)

    632 Josh Way, Alpine, California 91901

    Olena Preprod is a Certified Addiction Counselor (CAC) in Alpine, California. They treat Self Esteem, Aging, Learning Disorder.

    bkjljlkmkk,

    View profile
  • Bibi Car, Pre-Licensed Professional

    Bibi Car

    Pre-Licensed Professional, Psychiatric Nurse, Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner, Psychiatrist

    Remote only

    Bibi Car is a Pre-Licensed Professional in undefined, undefined. They treat Self Esteem, Social Anxiety, Self-Harm.

    testtest

    View profile

What is self esteem?

Self-esteem is how you view yourself—your sense of personal worth, capability, and value. It influences your decisions, your relationships, and how you handle challenges. People with healthy self-esteem tend to trust themselves, bounce back from setbacks more easily, and set boundaries without constant fear of rejection.

On the flip side, low self-esteem can lead to self-doubt, people-pleasing, perfectionism, or even self-sabotage. When your inner voice is overly critical or negative, it can become difficult to believe you’re good enough.

A self esteem therapist can help you understand where those negative beliefs come from—and how to change them.


How is self-esteem different from confidence?

Self-esteem and confidence are related, but they’re not exactly the same.

  • Confidence is about your belief in your abilities in specific areas—like doing well at work, public speaking, or learning a skill.
  • Self-esteem is broader. It’s your overall sense of who you are and how much you value yourself, regardless of how you perform.

You can be confident in some areas (like your job) and still struggle with low self-worth in others (like relationships or appearance). Self confidence therapy can help you improve both, by addressing the deeper beliefs that shape how you see yourself.


Can self-esteem change over time?

Absolutely. Self-esteem is not fixed—it evolves throughout your life based on your experiences, relationships, and inner dialogue.

You might notice shifts in self-esteem after:

  • A major life event (e.g., a breakup, job loss, or promotion)
  • Childhood messages from parents, teachers, or peers
  • Long-term criticism or trauma
  • Achievement or failure

The good news is that self-esteem therapy can help you build lasting change. With support, you can challenge old beliefs and replace them with a more balanced, kind perspective.


What causes low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem doesn’t just appear overnight—it usually builds slowly over time. Often, it begins in childhood, when we first start forming ideas about who we are and what we’re worth. But it can also develop in adulthood, especially after setbacks, criticism, or toxic relationships.

Common causes of low self-esteem include:

  • Critical or unsupportive caregivers: If you grew up in an environment where praise was rare and criticism was common, you may have learned to believe that you were never good enough.
  • Bullying or social rejection: Being excluded, teased, or judged—especially at a young age—can leave lasting emotional wounds.
  • Trauma or neglect: Physical or emotional abuse, neglect, or growing up in unstable conditions can undermine your sense of safety and self-worth.
  • Unrealistic expectations: Constant pressure to be perfect—whether from family, culture, school, or social media—can make you feel like you’re always falling short.
  • Negative self-talk: Over time, repeated internal messages like “I’m not smart,” “I’m a failure,” or “I don’t deserve love” can feel like facts instead of thoughts.
  • Academic or professional failure: Struggles at school or work can reinforce the idea that you’re not capable or valuable.
  • Toxic relationships: Being with someone who puts you down, gaslights you, or manipulates your emotions can eat away at your confidence.

A low self esteem therapist can help you untangle where your self-doubt comes from and offer tools to change the way you speak to—and think about—yourself.


How can I improve my self-esteem?

Improving self-esteem isn’t about becoming someone else—it’s about learning to see and accept yourself more clearly and kindly. It’s a process, and it takes patience. But with support and practice, you can shift the way you feel about yourself in a lasting way.

Here are some key ways to start improving your self-esteem:

Challenge negative self-talk

Start noticing when your inner critic shows up. Ask yourself:

  • “Would I say this to a friend?”
  • “Is this actually true, or just a fear?” Replace harsh thoughts with more balanced, realistic ones. You don’t have to be overly positive—just kinder and more honest.

Build on small successes

Set small, achievable goals and celebrate when you meet them. Each success—no matter how minor—proves to your brain that you are capable and trustworthy.

Surround yourself with supportive people

Choose to spend time with people who lift you up, not those who tear you down. Validation and encouragement from others can reinforce what you're building within yourself.

Practice self-compassion

Be gentle with yourself, especially when you mess up. Self-compassion doesn’t mean letting yourself off the hook—it means treating yourself with the same understanding you’d give someone else.

Use affirmations and journaling

Write down things you like about yourself, things you’ve accomplished, or times you’ve been proud. Keep a journal to track your growth and reflect on positive changes.

Take care of your body and mind

Regular sleep, movement, and nourishing food can all boost your mood and your sense of self-worth. Taking care of yourself physically reinforces the message: “I matter.”

Try therapy to build confidence

Working with a self esteem therapist or exploring self esteem counseling gives you a safe space to examine your beliefs, build new skills, and practice self-acceptance. A trained professional can help you see strengths you may have overlooked—and challenge the mental patterns holding you back.


How can I support someone in building self-esteem?

If someone you care about struggles with low self-worth, you can help—but remember, the most lasting change comes from within.

Here’s how you can be supportive:

  • Listen without judgment: Let them talk about how they feel without trying to “fix” it.
  • Offer encouragement, not empty praise: Be specific and genuine when acknowledging their strengths.
  • Model self-compassion: Your example can help them feel safe to do the same.
  • Avoid comparisons: Even well-meaning comments can sometimes make people feel worse.
  • Encourage therapy: Gently suggest self esteem counseling if it seems right—they may not realize it’s an option.

You can’t build someone else’s self-esteem for them—but your support can be a powerful part of their journey.


Can someone have too much self-esteem?

There’s a difference between healthy self-esteem and inflated self-importance. When self-esteem turns into arrogance, entitlement, or a lack of empathy, it may signal something else—like narcissistic traits or insecurity masked as confidence.

Healthy self-esteem is grounded. It means knowing your worth without putting others down or needing constant validation. It allows you to be confident and humble at the same time.

Self-esteem therapy can help you find that balance—especially if you're unsure whether you're being too hard on yourself or too self-protective.


Does praise help build self-esteem?

Praise can help—but only when it’s genuine, specific, and balanced.

Overpraising (especially in childhood) or offering praise without context can actually backfire, leading to perfectionism or a fear of failure. On the other hand, meaningful praise that recognizes effort, growth, or resilience can reinforce a healthy sense of self.

In therapy, many people discover that they’ve been chasing external validation while ignoring their inner voice. Self confidence therapy can help shift that focus inward—so you feel more confident even without constant reassurance.


Are people with high self-esteem always happy?

No—people with high self-esteem still have bad days, insecurities, and emotional ups and downs. But they tend to handle those challenges differently. They’re more likely to:

  • Bounce back from setbacks
  • Speak up for themselves
  • Ask for help when needed
  • Set boundaries with others
  • Feel secure even when things go wrong

Self-esteem doesn’t erase pain—but it helps you believe you can get through it. That belief can be life-changing.

If you’ve ever asked, does therapy help with self esteem?—the answer is yes. A good therapist can help you build that belief from the inside out.


Does boosting self-esteem solve all mental health issues?

Boosting your self-esteem can have a powerful impact on your life—but it’s not a cure-all for every mental health issue. Think of self-esteem as one piece of a larger puzzle. When it’s low, it can make you more vulnerable to conditions like depression, anxiety, and eating disorders. But improving it doesn’t automatically erase deeper or more complex emotional struggles.

For example:

  • If you’re dealing with depression, boosting your self-esteem can help counter the feelings of worthlessness—but you may still need therapy, medication, or other supports to address the full picture.
  • If you have anxiety, feeling more confident might make social situations easier, but it may not stop the physical symptoms or looping thoughts without additional tools.
  • If you’ve experienced trauma, your self-worth may have been deeply impacted—but healing often involves working through the emotional pain itself, not just building confidence.

That said, therapy for self esteem is often an important part of a broader treatment plan. When you believe you are worthy of care, respect, and happiness, you’re more likely to:

  • Set healthy boundaries
  • Speak up for your needs
  • Stick with treatment
  • Make choices that support your well-being

So while self esteem counseling won’t fix everything, it often makes other forms of healing more effective. Think of it as the foundation you build on, not the entire house.

A skilled therapist for low self esteem will help you figure out how your self-worth connects with your overall mental health—and guide you toward a balanced, holistic path forward.

Whether you’re navigating self-doubt, perfectionism, or a lifetime of negative beliefs, therapy for low self-esteem can help you feel more grounded and whole. From self esteem counseling to therapy to build confidence, the right support can help you change the way you see yourself—and change your life in the process.

Find care for Self Esteem

Remember, recovery is possible. With early intervention, a supportive network, and the right professional care, you can overcome the challenges of Self Esteem and build a fulfilling life. We are here to help you find care.

Share: